Category: Mindfulness

Gratitude is something that is sorely lacking today. Too many people feel they are entitled to what they have, and even a simple “thank you” is too much to ask from them. A lot of the stress we feel about our lives can be traced to feel entitled to the “nice things” that others have. Still, I believe that if you learn how to practice gratitude, you can shift your focus—and with this new attitude, everything can change.

“Be thankful for what you have; you’ll end up having more. If you concentrate on what you don’t have, you will never, ever have enough.” – Oprah Winfrey

“A Man Must Feel the Bite of Winter to Feel the Warmth of the Hearth.” If you are a Game of Thrones fan, then you’ve heard these words before, but more than a quote from a TV program, it is a beautiful description of what gratitude is and why it is an essential antidote to the emptiness we feel in life. Because of the comforts that surround us—comforts that previous generations would have found unimaginable—that we have become numb, entitled, and unable to feel gratitude for what we have.

We have become numb, entitled, and unable to feel gratitude for what we have

Today we have smartphones connected permanently to the internet. We have access to the repositories of all the knowledge of humankind, but imagine if there was no internet. No instant communication with your friends wherever they may be in the world. No Wikipedia or other websites from which we can mine the collective knowledge of the world. Just 20 years ago, that was the reality.

I remember a time when we had to go to the library to access the internet because the home internet was not yet a thing. It is because I know what it was like before the internet that I appreciate its existence more.

Now apply that to something closer to home. Imagine what life would be like to be an orphan. To not have a mother nagging you to put on a shirt or some other mundane “motherly” thing. To not have a father giving outdated life advice while teaching you how to do “manly” things more suited to the 1950s. Just the thought of not having your parents ought to get you to call them right now to tell them you love them.

Mindfulness As A Method Of Practicing Gratitude

If you haven’t seen my article on mindfulness, maybe now would be a good time to give it a read. Mindfulness is the ability to appreciate the present and the things we have in the here and now. By practicing mindfulness and the science of gratitude, we can be grateful for what we have, even if it is not necessarily what we want, or not as good as what we desired.

A mindful person lives in the moment and enjoys the wonders of what they possess at the moment. By being content, the mindful person does not covet what they do not have. They are grateful for what they already have and do not take for granted their blessings or the achievements they have reached. A person trained in the art of mindfulness will savor with gratitude the life they already have. They will not covet a life that they could have had or that they desired in their youth.

For example, I know a man who became a lawyer at the age of 33. Recently, he lost both his parents within two years of each other. His doctor suggested that he discipline himself and develop mindfulness as an antidote for chronic, long-term dysthymia, which is the combination of an anxiety disorder and low-grade depression.

If this man decided to only focus on the negatives in his world, he might be cursing the powers that be for taking away his parents. He could be resenting the fact that it took him so long to become a lawyer.

But a mindful and grateful heart would teach him to be thankful that he had his parents for the first 30 years of his life. He had the privilege of becoming a lawyer in a state where more than 80% of those who finish law school do not ever attain this status. He has a lot to be grateful for if only he can train himself to see the light instead of dwell in the darkness.

He has a lot to be grateful for if only he can train himself to see the light instead of dwell in the darkness

In a way, mindfulness and gratitude will form a positive feedback loop in your life. Try it and watch as your attitude toward everything in your life changes.

The Scientific Argument In Favor Of Gratefulness

In a study, researchers learned that a person’s happiness level could be stable over the long term. This means that a grateful person can have a high level of happiness, and they can sustain it over a prolonged period. So, the bottom line here is: A grateful person is happier. (Consider rereading what I wrote about mindfulness earlier in this post, and start reaping the benefits of being happier right now.)

The same study also found that not only were people with a grateful mindset 25% happier, but they were far more optimistic about the future, too. One way to understand this is that the person who has a positive outlook in life will see the world differently. The grateful attitude for the present will permeate their attitude for the future.

If you think about it, this makes perfect sense. Someone with a grateful heart has a positive outlook on life because they aren’t wasting time being jealous or coveting what they do not have. They are already happy because they are content with their life.

This positive attitude has even farther-reaching effects on other aspects of a grateful person’s life. Depression or anxiety are far less likely to take hold because of the grateful attitude that increases their baseline happiness.

A grateful, happy person is less likely to seek out alcohol, drugs, or other compulsive behaviors. This is because these are behaviors that people use to fill a void in their lives. They wouldn’t have to fill a void if they were already fulfilled. Gratefulness means that there is much less of a chance that compulsive behaviors will become attractive to them in the first place.

The Practice Of Gratitude In Our Daily Lives 

For those with religious inclinations, the practice of gratitude begins with prayer at the start of their day. Whether they are Christians, Jews, or Muslims, each will typically take part in morning prayers. During this practice, the faithful will thank a higher power for allowing them to rise in the morning after a restful night’s sleep.

If that’s not your cup of tea, then wake up nevertheless with a sense of gratitude. Even if you don’t practice any religion, it would be beneficial to reflect in the morning and take stock of what you have. Do not take anything for granted! If you have a roof over your head, a warm bed, and enough to eat, then you should be grateful.

Be grateful that breakfast is merely a matter of walking into your kitchen and opening the refrigerator or cabinets. Consider how so many others must work or even beg for the meager sums they would need to get the first or only meal of their day.

The Power Of Thank You

“Thank you” should be an important phrase in your vocabulary. Say thank you when someone does you a favor or offers you a simple act of kindness—and if this is not something that you do as a matter of course, well, its time you made it a habit now. Giving thanks is an excellent way to develop an attitude of gratefulness, even if it is just in the little things.

Thank the person in front of you for holding the door for you. Thank your partner for handing you your first cup of coffee each morning. Thank your administrative assistant for bringing you your morning mail at work. It may feel awkward at first, but eventually, it will become a habit.

As a bonus, people will learn to appreciate—and emulate—your newly-developed sense of good manners. The practice of saying “please” and “thank you” has become a lost art in this era of entitlement—the 21st Century. You are spreading gratitude by bringing good manners back into the modern age.

The practice of saying “please” and “thank you” has become a lost art in this era of entitlement

If you want to learn more, you can draw inspiration from the movie Happy, Thank You, More Please. As the movie title suggests, the audience is invited to have an attitude of Happy, Thank You, More Please. If something makes you happy, then be grateful by saying thank you to the person who made you feel this way, and the “More Please” is in reference to asking for more of the thing that made you happy.

Gratitude And The Law Of Attraction

There are many people today who believe in something called the law of attraction. They ascertain that when we want something and work hard to make it happen—or attract it—the universe will somehow bring it to us. For example, if we want a promotion at work, and if we diligently strive to attract the promotion, eventually, we will receive it. There is a mystical, quasi-religious aspect to the law of attraction. Suffice to say that it has many followers, simply because it appears to work.

Even for those of us who don’t necessarily put much stock in the other-worldly, it still makes sense. After all, how do we attract something? By acting toward making it happen. How does an employee attract a promotion? By working more hours, being more efficient, or generally acting in a manner in which they would be more deserving of a promotion.

The same holds with an attitude of gratitude. By being grateful even for small favors or kindnesses, you will attract people to be positively disposed toward you. People tend to feel good and act accordingly when they receive gratitude.

That Uber driver you thanked for bringing you to work? He might have been working all night, perhaps dealing with difficult customers. That small act of kindness in thanking him might be the first nice thing he experienced during his entire shift. That diner waitress you thanked for bringing you your first coffee of the day? That little bit of positive reinforcement and kindness could be the only thing that is holding back her tears.

In both and many other cases, the gratitude you show might very well attract even more acts of kindness from others. The kindness you display may resonate with others, and in turn, make them feel more grateful and allow them to experience a more positive outlook in life. Even if only for the moment that you gave them that appreciative interaction—that brief experience might help them to see that it is possible to obtain an attitude of gratefulness.

Life Is What You Make It. So, Why Not Make It A Grateful Experience?

The ability to be thankful for both small things and great blessings will change your outlook. It can spark a positive feedback loop that will change your inner attitude—and your entire life.

There are even scientific studies that suggest living gratefully can improve your quality of life. Your positive outlook and grateful attitude can stave off depression, as well as many other sources of negativity in your life. Think of it this way: Gratitude helps increase your positivity, and this positivity will help you resist succumbing to the onslaught of negative vibes around you every day.

This positive feedback loop within protects you even further because you will not accumulate negativity, and you’ll have a lower chance of engaging in any risky, compulsive behaviors, which might cause you even more problems later on. After all, if you feel good about yourself, you are far less likely to do drugs or consume excessive amounts of alcohol to “feel better”—and, best of all—this improvement in your attitude can radiate toward others around you.

By practicing gratitude, you may very well be bringing this gift to others in your day-to-day life.

Original post

 

About the Author

Rebecca Temsen is a Blogger & Editor at selfdevelopmentsecrets.com.

A mother is something extraordinary. It goes beyond the basics of what a “mother” is or should be. Mother is the feminine, a woman who provides, loves, nurtures, and creates. A woman of strength and softness with a heart so compassionate that her warmth comes through with just a simple hug. So much love we have for these wild women who have raised us, sheltered us, taught us lessons, listened, nurtured, and also stayed in her own vulnerability showing us even the magical have flaws in perfection and one should only show their authentic self. This is a day to celebrate them, yourself, whoever it may be that is symbolized as this embodiment of complete love and that has helped you through your life.

A mother is in my eyes a type of medicine woman. They heal with so many lessons and love, which they provide. Always giving, beyond themselves, because that is their soul and selfless desire; what devotion they have to their roles of giving. Since these women give us so much medicine, I thought it was only proper that we treat them with medicine on their special day of celebration. I’m speaking of the medicine of Cacao.

“I often call chocolate the best-known food that nobody knows anything about,” said Alexandra Leaf, a self-described “chocolate educator” who runs a business called Chocolate Tours of New York City.
Read more: https://www.smithsonianmag.com/arts-culture/a-brief-history-of-chocolate-21860917/#WSL7Rh4jPcgU0sJQ.99

Deep in the amazon basin in South America, between Ecuador and Peru, the people would put the fruit whole inside of water mostly for making alcohol, to find that when the bean would ferment it would completely change, becoming a bioavailable food. Culturally Cacao developed in Southern Mexico and Guatemala, among the Mayan and later Aztec kingdoms. Culturally meaning that it became a common part of daily life, cuisine, ritual, and art mythology. These people would make the bean into a chocolate and mix it with herbs, creating an elixir finding that this drink would help them expand in multiple ways. Some would say it opens your heart and portals in the body. It was used both for spiritual reasons as well as for healthy fats which help with brain developing properties, amazing minerals such as magnesium, antioxidants that help the body naturally detoxify, and lastly it brings mind altering properties due to Alkaloids. This was a drink for uplifting the mood, gaining a natural source of energy, and also for relaxation. The experience is different for everyone. Some would say they have more of a psychedelic experience, leaving them in a “high.” Some would say it helped them through depressed feelings, times of doubt and stress. And for others it was mostly just used for rites of passage, funerals, weddings, births, etc. Creating an uplifting mood, a level of openness to what is, feeling blissful and fully alive. How could we not want to treat our mothers, the complete divine, to this divine drink?

Now instead of making a recipe myself, I decided to go to a better source, a dear friend of mines company, Cacoco, based out of Santa Cruz, Ca. I want to share this with you for a few reasons. First off, this company has a mission to not only supply their customers a healthy, safe, and delicious product with uncompromised quality and integrity, but to also embrace environmental sustainability, healthy vibrant lifestyles, and social responsibility.

I have some of the deepest respect for these guys and their mission. Food as medicine and enjoyment is some of the finest gifts from this earth we can get. These fellas are going to make an impact on this planet and community in beautiful ways, as they already are. I feel a way we can impact growth as humans and really start giving back to our planet more is by celebrating people’s gifts that they are blessed with, their talents, passions and offer an energy exchange in return.

Places to order; directly from their site https://drinkcacoco.com/pages/about; Found in Whole Foods Markets in Northern California; Found in health food stores all over the west coast.

         I hope you enjoy this day of the feminine and really celebrate, celebrate for all of the gifts that Mothers have blessed us with.

 

About the Author: 

Chelsea Shapouri, currently in Ventura, California, is an entrepreneur with the love for holistic health, yoga/meditation, herbal medicine, travel, and the outdoors. Her aim is to help people achieve their true authenticity, move away from stress and into balance using her knowledge with Holistic Living. Chelsea currently is teaching “Yoga Medicine” at local studios and indoor rock climbing gyms, creating a cook book, taking photos with her favorite companions, hosting workshops locally, and enjoying the ocean and trails on her days off. To learn more about her mission and offers you can go to her website; Thegrainsoflife.com or email her at; thegrainsoflife@yahoo.com. Join the team to spread this awareness of happiness as well as taking care of our earth and people.

Nature has always been my “safe space”. When life gets a little too much, I find my way to the trees, dig my toes into the dirt, and breathe. It’s there that I feel most at home, and sooner or later, I find the connection to Earth helps me re-connect to my self as well. Unfortunately, winter always brings a dip in this sense of connection. As a native-Californian, I thrive on sunshine. The snowy meadows and dreary rain clouds are not exactly what I consider inviting. By the time winter comes to a close, I find myself feeling disconnected, flustered, and a little lost. Which is why I use Spring as an opportunity to reconnect with Mother Earth. The following are a few practices that help me rebuild my connection with Mother Earth; follow along and join me in building a stronger, lasting relationship with her this Spring!

Stop and smell the roses (or wildflowers)

While I generally keep away from clichés, I couldn’t help myself with this one. Spring is a time when trees start getting their leaves back, hills turn vibrant shades of green, and wildflowers start working their way up through the melting frost. Take time this season to appreciate the vibrant world budding around you.

Watch a young tree swaying in the wind outside your office window. Pause while your dog sniffs a tree to gaze at your neighbor’s stunning garden. Plant a garden of your own and watch it come to life as the season progresses. Or simply sit outside and be. Feel the air against your cheek, smell the fragrant flowers and fresh grass all around you, watch the clouds float across the sky. Simply taking a moment to appreciate nature can help you reconnect to Mother Earth and all her abundance.

Dance in the rain

Not every day in Spring is sunshine and roses. The rainclouds will still come. But don’t let them bring you down! Embrace the showers and all they do to help Mother Earth grow more luscious every day. Next time it rains, take a moment to be with that rain.

Maybe it’s simply standing under an awning and feeling the crisp air of a rainy day while you contemplate the life that this dreary weather brings. Or maybe you put on a swimsuit, head to a muddy puddle, and dance joyously as the rain splatters on your hair. However you decide to experience it, let yourself feel the delight Mother Earth feels when the pouring rain nourishes her dry body.

Leave your shoes at home

Whether you spend five minutes standing with your toes in the grass or decide to go for a barefoot hike through the countryside, there is hardly a more powerful way to reconnect with Mother Earth than taking off your shoes.

Forming a connection between the sole of your foot and Mother Earth’s diverse landscape is a powerful way to feel the pulse of the Earth beneath you, find that center that runs from the core of your heart to the core of the planet, and remember the stability and love that Mother Earth provides every single day.

Don’t be afraid to get dirty

This spring, get your hands dirty. You can start with something small, like lying down on a grassy hill without putting a towel down, or you can go all in and spend some time playing in the mud or rolling down a hill. Embrace the inner child that longs to get as close to Mother Earth as possible, and don’t worry if some grass stains result. It’s a small price to pay for the joy and connection you’ll find when you immerse yourself in Earth.

Reconnect with Mother Earth and maintain that connection

These practices are all simple ways to find your connection, but it’s easier to reconnect with Mother Earth than it is to maintain that connection. Once you find that connection, do your best to hold onto it. One way to do that is to take these practices and incorporate them into your daily (or weekly) routine. Another is to weave it together with other practices, like journaling, yoga, or meditation, that support a deeper connection with the world around you. Whatever practices speak to you, don’t just try them from time to time. Live them. Become them. And watch as they lead you closer to Mother Earth with each passing day.

About the Author

Sarah Dittmore, the Director of Operations at True Nature Travels, is always seeking a new adventure. When she’s not barefoot hiking in the mountains of Peru, kayaking around an island off the coast of Italy, or camping in a rainforest in Costa Rica, Sarah writes about her adventures on her travel blog, Autobiography of an Adventurer. Join her as she travels the world and documents the wild and wonderful things she discovers along the way at www.autobiographyofanadventurer.com.

Is it really already time to think about spring? I don’t know about you, but the as much as I adore the sunshine and wildflowers that come with the season, I always have a difficult time pulling myself out of the winter doldrums and into the elation of spring. My body is still heavy with soups and cocoa, my eyes still droop from short days and long nights, and my mind is weary from months of hibernation and self-reflection. This transition has been, and probably always will be, a difficult one for me. Which is why I have created a sort of spring cleaning tradition to enact when the poppies start blooming and the tree leaves return. If embracing the high-energy season of spring seems daunting, this routine will help.

Step 1: Clean out your physical space

Before I can apply the spirit of spring cleaning to my lifestyle or mental space, I have to apply it to my home. I have a Spotify playlist entitled “Dance it Out.” I turn the speakers on high, open all the windows (sorry neighbors), and I dance it out. I dance out the dust bunnies, toothpaste splattered mirrors, and unvacuumed carpets. Then I dig into the desk drawers and back closet space, making “Trash” and “Giveaway” piles larger than expected.

When spring cleaning day (or week, if I am being entirely honest) comes around, I stick with three strict rules. Rule 1: If I haven’t used it over the past season or forgot I had it, I’m getting rid of it. Rule 2: Everything has a place; if it doesn’t and I’m just trying to make room for it (on bookshelves, countertops, or in my dresser), then I’m getting rid of it. Rule 3: If it doesn’t have an obvious and necessary use, and doesn’t bring me some personal or sentimental joy, I’m getting rid of it. Take the edamame growing kit my neighbor gave me; I haven’t used it, I don’t know where to put it, and honestly, I have no interest in growing edamame when it’s like $2 at Trader Joes. So that one goes in the giveaway pile. Soon enough, my apartment starts to look less like a hoarder’s den and more like a home.

Step 2: Give your routine new life

Once my living quarters have been scrubbed and re-organized, I turn the mop on my lifestyle. I grab a pen and paper (or maybe I have an entire notebook dedicated to this purpose, but that’s beside the point…) and I start sketching out my schedule. I look back on the past three months and jot down what my average routine was. When did I work? When did I exercise? When did I see friends, do art, or go outside?

On the next page, I think about what I think worked for me and what I think I would like to change. This year, for example, I started a workout routine over the winter that brought me to the climbing gym three days a week. I really enjoyed that and would like to keep in up in the spring. I did not, however, write nearly as much as I had intended to. That is something I want to carve more time out for.

So, with all these notes in mind and on paper, I start designing an ideal spring schedule. I know I won’t stick to it every day, so I try not to be too specific, but I set general goals like “write for an hour before work every morning” or “go for a 4+ mile hike at least once a week”. Sometimes the goals are specific, like “meditate for five minutes every day as soon as you wake up.” Other times they are really vague, like “say yes to new things.” Either way, I dedicate some time to giving my schedule and routine the spring cleaning treatment, then do my best to stick with it as the season progresses.

Step 3: Power wash your mental space

Finally, it’s time to brush the cobwebs away and dig into the well-packed boxes shoved into the recesses of my mind. During the winter, I go into full hibernation mode. I pretty much live off of books, baths, and tea from December through February and do my best to stay as covered by blankets as possible throughout the season. When Spring comes, I’m still content with my lethargy and my brain moves with the slow, gentle pace of a sleepy tortoise.

But spring is a time for action. It’s a time for a change and trying new things. Growth, renewal, birth; these are the themes of the season and they don’t pair well with lethargy and melancholy.

Which is why the final step of my spring cleaning routine is to clean out my mind. Not unlike my methods for cleaning my physical space and routine, my mental cleaning process involves a careful consideration of what to keep and what to let go. I usually start static; I sit in meditation or else get a journal out and start contemplating where my mind is at. How do I feel about myself lately? What about how I engage with others, with my goals, with my work, and with my environment? Do I feel happy lately? Sad? Tired? Energetic? I evaluate my mental space with a kind eye, lacking judgment and simply gaining awareness as to what is going on in there.

Then I move onto something active. I go for a hike, get out on the paddleboard, or flow through a vigorous yoga practice. I move until my body drips with sweat and my brain finds that sweet, endorphin-filled space of emptiness.

Lastly, I go back to stillness and turn my thoughts to questions like, “what brings me joy?” and “what I love most about myself?” As is my style, I make a list. I plant seeds of dreams, goals, and ambitions. I water them with love and hope. Then I get outside and let that bright spring sunshine help them grow into something beautiful.